Beyond the Baby Blues

Understanding Postpartum Depression and When to Seek Help

That's normal. That's the baby blues.

But sometimes, it lingers. Sometimes, it deepens. And if that's been your experience, I want to say to you with love: you're not broken, and you're not alone. You might be up against something else: something that deserves care and attention.

Let's take a deep breath and walk through it, one sure step at a time.

What Are the Baby Blues?

The "baby blues" strike up to 80 percent of new moms. They typically begin a few days after birth and diminish by two weeks. They're powered by hormone changes, sleep deprivation and emotional whiplash of new motherhood.

Common signs of baby blues:

• Mood swings
• Crying spells
• Anxiety or irritability
• Difficulty sleeping (even if your baby is)
• Struggling but finding moments of joy

Such feelings are intense and, for most, they go away on their own. But what if they don't?

Postpartum Depression Is Different

Postpartum depression (PPD) can resemble baby blues at first—but it hangs around, gets worse, and interferes with your ability to function day to day. It hits one in roughly seven moms, no matter how ready, loved or "together" they may have been.

Here's what to watch for:

• Persistent sadness or hopelessness
• Not finding interest in the things you used to like
• Trouble bonding with your baby
• Intrusive or scary thoughts
• Having thoughts that you are worthless or a "bad mom"
• Withdrawing from friends and family
• Misuse of the baby hurting yourself or baby

These aren't just "hormones." They're signals. And like all signals, they're seeking attention — not judgment.

You Are Not Failing - You're Experiencing

Let me stop right there and say: Having these feelings does not mean you are weak. It makes you human.

Physically, emotionally, spiritually, your nervous system is taking in a tidal wave of change. Matrescence, the transition into motherhood, is as life-altering as adolescence. And if teens need support, so do new mothers.

So, if your inner voice has begun murmuring to you that something is amiss … listen to that murmur.

Asking For Help When And How

If more than two weeks go by and your mood isn't on the upswing — or is even worsening — please get help.

Here are grounded next steps:

Talk to your provider

Talk to your OB, midwife or primary doctor about your symptoms. They've heard it all before — and they have tools to assist.

Connect with a therapist

A perinatal mental health specialist can offer support specific to this precise season. Check resources like:

• Postpartum Support International
• The Motherhood Center
• Therapy directories such as Psychology Today (apply the "postpartum" filter)

Open up to your circle

Share how you really are with at least one trusted person. It would seem that at times, the process of softening pain starts with naming the pain.

Soothing Ways to Keep It Real

As you are seeking support, here are some daily grounding practices to help carry you through:

• Breathe into your belly. Let the exhalation last longer than the inhalation.
• Step outside, barefoot if possible. Nature restores what noise depletes.
• Nourish with intention. Simple, warm meals count.
• Rest without guilt. Sleep isn't a luxury—it's medicine.
• Write a few real thoughts. Journal without a filter, for two lines, if that.

These aren't cures—they're anchors.

You Need Help, Not Judgment

Motherhood isn't a performance. It's a profound transformation. And like all major changes, it carries light and shadow.

If you're finding yourself in the dark more than you would like to be, let this be your invitation to step into the light of help.

It's perfectly O.K. to need help. On the contrary, asking for it is among the most courageous things that motherhood can be.