Am I Creating Bad Habits?

Why Bedtime Comfort Isn't Spoiling Your Baby

Spoiler alert: No, you're not "ruining" your baby by rocking them to sleep. You're being a mom. And yes—there's research to back that up.

If you've ever paced your nursery at 2AM with a swaddle in one hand and Google in the other, frantically searching "Am I creating bad sleep habits by holding my baby?"—you're in good company. The myth that nighttime comfort = long-term sleep dependency is everywhere, and honestly? It's exhausting.

Let's unpack that with logic, research, and a little grace.

The Anxiety Behind the Habit Fear

Many FTMs (and let's be real, even second- and third-timers) secretly wonder:

"If I rock them now… will they need me to rock them forever?"

This fear isn't about sleep. It's about validation. About feeling like you're doing it right. And when online forums, books, and unsolicited auntie advice all contradict each other? You start doubting the most natural thing: comforting your baby.

What the Research Actually Says

Comforting your baby at bedtime supports:

• Secure attachment: Babies learn that their cries are met with care. This builds trust and emotional regulation over time.
• Better long-term sleep: Responsive care now sets a foundation for future sleep independence. Yes, even if that looks like contact naps right now.
• Lower stress (for both of you): Cortisol levels drop when babies are soothed—meaning you're literally helping their developing brain chill out.

📚 Sources include pediatric sleep researchers, infant development psychologists, and attachment theory studies. (Want citations? I've got you.)

Let's Bust Some Myths

Real Talk from the Trenches

Here's what I wish someone told me:

"Holding your baby through sleep regressions, teething, or growth spurts isn't creating bad habits. It's responding to a human need."

You're not choosing between independence and comfort. You're creating a bridge to independence by showing up consistently.

So What Can You Actually Do?

Here's Chloe-style practical advice:

• Create small, sustainable bedtime routines even if they include rocking or feeding. Routines matter more than the method.
• Use comfort as a tool, not a trap. Some nights will need more snuggles. Others might surprise you.
• Track patterns, not perfection. If your baby is slowly needing less help over time, you're on the right track.
• Set boundaries when you're ready, not because someone on the internet said to.

Final Takeaway

You're not creating bad habits—you're creating connection. And in those quiet, sleepy moments, your baby is learning the most important lesson: I am safe. I am loved. I can rest.

So breathe easy, mama. That rocking chair isn't a crutch. It's a gift.